The Blogging Parlour

I think I have some biscuit crumbs down my trousers.

In Accordance With Prophecy

HeaderStarcraft

Friend Raynor!

There’s a prophecy which we’ve never mentioned before that foretells the exact plot of this game! In fact the prophecy also says we’re about to have this conversation, and the prophecy also tells me what you’re going to have for breakfast tomorrow morning, and the prophecy says our lucky numbers are 11, 14, 27, and 34… Although that part of the prophecy is… unclear.

To understand what the prophecy means you’re going to have to build a base and fight and blow stuff up until you trigger a cutscene from the keepers of the prophecy. I know it makes no sense to fight to the death to keep anyone from knowing the meaning of a prophecy which appears to be known by all Protoss, one that could save or destroy everyone in existence, but we’re Protoss, it’s what we do.

According to the prophecy we should not have done any of the stuff we’ve done so far, and you shouldn’t do any of the stuff you’ve said you want to do! All life in the galaxy will burn if you do! It may already be too late!

I know telling you this earlier would have saved us all a lot of wasted lives and effort, but this prophecy which has existed for thousands of years which every single Protoss apparently knows about but apparently doesn’t know the meaning of, only occurred to me this morning. It’s hard waking up every morning and checking to see if it was in accordance with ancient prophecy.

This post first appeared as a comment on Rock Paper Shotgun on February 2 2013.

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